Restoring good faith at home

Wednesday, November 13th, 2013

2013 Fall Edition of Banana Moments: Family Business Quarterly

Joanna Jullien “Parental authority cannot be taken. It can only be lost when we surrender it.” Photo by: Christi Benz

Good faith is very difficult to discern in the social network; it refers to governing our lives in accordance with standards of honesty, trust, and sincerity and we can easily find evidence of how far from the mark our modern lifestyles operate from this benchmark.  Some examples might include:

  • Clicking agree to a social media app terms and conditions of use without reading, and then complaining about lack of privacy
  • The ease with which we are ready to criticize and complain about poor service on Yelp; how many people make the effort to publish praise?
  • Revenge porn
  • Spreading kernels of truth about what a former friend shared in private as a way to satisfy the craving for vengeance of hurt feelings
  • Pedophiles posing as innocent, trustworthy peers to gain trust and snare children into exploitative relationship
  • Going straight to the principal to complain when a child has issues with a teacher
  • Handing over wireless mobile devices to children who have not been trained on the virtues of civility (self-control, compassion, kindness, empathy, respect for self and others) contributing significantly to a hostile social environment that inspires cyberbullying

The cyber realm is considered by many as an anonymous free-for-all, without thought of consequences and individual accountability. The potential emotional, spiritual and psychological harm to our children is not fully appreciated as a matter of what you believe. For it is in the realm of hearts and minds that children will find personal security or be led by the confluence of insecure, fear-based thinking disconnecting us from truth.

In a recent cyberbullying incident turned fatal for Rebecca Sedwick of Tampa, Florida, the Polk County Sheriff , Grady Judd, is clearly frustrated at the abdication of the parents of the teens arrested for felony stalking associated with Sedwick’s suicide.


The most telling thing about this headline is the loss of confidence in the parent role to discipline children. The entire news piece of this video above is an indictment of our parenting culture as one that does not prepare children to be good citizens, but most certainly sets up expectations for children to be uncivil, undisciplined, and harbor thoughts of and express hatred without expecting to be held accountable. For under the right circumstances and the wrong thinking, we are all capable of anything.

And then, upon preparing this edition for publication, we are witnessing another school shooting at a middle school in Sparks, Nevada by a 12-year-old boy who wounded two students and then killed a math teacher and himself. In the statement below, the question is why? Why would a 12-year-old have it in his heart and mind to murder?

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My father told me something that didn’t make sense until I had enough life experience to validate it:  “You know honey,” he said, “Something is only true unless you allow it to be so in your own mind”.

That is empowerment.

So let us not be confused about this fact: a lie in this fallen world and hyped in the network culture can become an experience that murders the truth. The truth is that our children are not bullies, stalkers,  murderers and drug addicts. What we are witnessing and experiencing with youth today is very real with consequences, but it is not rooted in truth.  So this 2013 fall edition of Banana Moments: Family Business Quarterly examines how parents can gird our own hearts and minds and those of our of children with the truth that you have the power to choose what to believe, no matter what is happening in the world, and to forgive the things that have harmed or offended you – starting at home.

The voices in this edition offer practical perspectives and ways to demonstrate good faith with our children dealing with the modern issues growing up in a cyber-powered world including maintaining open parent-child communication, overcoming distraction and learning issues, recovering from risky choices, bonding in single parent households and blended families, and empowering children to create a peaceful society.

2013 Fall Edition Table of Contents


2013 October Monthly Round Up

Banana Moments Blog Updates

Sacramento Cyber Safety Examiner


 Worthy training events

Recovery Happens

November 15, 2013 – Understanding and Treating Adolescent and Adult Addiction Issues with Jon Daily

This seminar explains current drug trends, addiction to intoxication not the drug, and how systems participate in illness and wellness. Very insightful for counselors, educators, health care professionals and parents. Reduces the stigma and misperceptions about loving and helping people suffering from addiction into recovery.

For more information about upcoming trainings about how drug culture, brain, mind and relationships contribute to mental health, go to Recovery Happens and Therapeutic Solutions 360.

Project Parent – San Juan Unified School District

Help for parenting difficult teens and strengthening the parent-child bonds

Dates: Mondays — 9/30/13—12/16/13 (10 weeks) No class on 11/11 and 11/25
Location: Terra Nova Counseling Center, 5750 Sunrise Blvd., Citrus Heights, Time: 6:00 p.m.— 9:00 p.m.

For more information about future training contact, SJUSD FACE Department (916) 971-7929

How to Rewrite Beautiful

A counseling group for women overcoming substance abuse, eating disorders and codependency

Contact: Mary Lisa Patton, BA Psych, CADC-II, ICADC #A9490713  (530)270-9294


Thank you to sponsors of Banana Moments

Angela Chanter, PsyD., Therapeutic Solutions 360, in Roseville, Ca. Family-centric solutions to  youth issues including anxiety, depression, addiction, and behavior disorders.

Dr. Dennis Harding in Auburn, California, successfully treats children and adolescents with mental health issues. His practice is based around a treatment called Atlas Orthogonal Chiropractic which uses a magnetic pulse to gently tap the atlas back into alignment.




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About Joanna Jullien

Joanna Jullien

Joanna ( and her husband have raised two sons in Roseville, CA. She has a degree from U.C. Berkeley in Social Anthropology (corporate culture). Her honors thesis was awarded the Kroeber Prize and funding from National Science Foundation grant. Joanna writes to help parents with the modern-day leadership challenges of raising children. She is a contributing writer for The Granite Bay View, the Press Tribune, the Sacramento Examiner, and editor of Banana Moments.