Hero logic and anti-bullying
Monday, May 7th, 2012
Photo: Bohman_(Flickr)
Cyberbullying is the use of electronic media (Facebook and texting) to harass, intimidate or gang up on an individual or group.
Cyberbullying is one of the prevailing concerns of parents and what most people do not realize is that bullying requires a victim mentality as every bully will tell you why they are offended by the target and why she deserves it.
What is required by everyone, including the bullies, the targets and bystanders, is an anti-bully mentality: hero logic.
- Discuss the concept of being a hero with your child. A hero is someone who will not be influenced by others who try to intimidate, coax, or cajole him into being oppressed by or attempt to dominate others.
- A hero understands and plays by the rules.
- A hero views bullies as the opponent. Know yourself and your opponent, and you will prevail. This means you have to know the boundaries of your values -what you will believe and do regardless of what others say and do.
- Understand the bullies’ point of view (do not necessarily agree with it).
- Then you can realize that there is a little bully and hero in all of us. Pretty much cuts the bully down to size.
- Don’t let others define you. Know your identity. (Family values, your friends, what you love, what your talents are, what you stand for – or believe, what impact do you want to have on your family and community)
- Ask yourself, am I the bully sometimes? If you have been a bully, seek out those you have hurt and apologize.
- No one succeeds alone. Seek out other heroes, who have a selfless concern for others. These are your allies- they can be fellow students, teachers, counselors, etc.
- If your child doesn’t already have one, find a mentor, or coach who shares your interests and can support your goals.
- Make an identity statement about your child’s values, beliefs and greatest strengths. Help your child realize what you admire about her.
Related reading:
Why kids cyberbully and what to do about it
How teens rule their cyber world
- For help with peer abuse awareness and prevention go to: B.R.A.V.E. Society (Read Michael Berry’s story)
- For help with children and families dealing with crisis and emotional stress go to: Franny’s House
