CyberParenting Hot Topics on TheFish103.9FM returns Tuesday, January 8

When my oldest was 14 he did not want oversight of his affairs and I gave him as much space as I felt was appropriate. On one occasion, he was angry and tried to get me to “butt out of his life”. It was tempting to just give in and back off – thinking there could be peace if I just complied with his demand. I …

CyberParenting Topics on TheFish103.9FM Tuesdays returns January 8, 2013

 

In a cyber-powered world it is easy to believe we can “Google” everything we need to know.  This power to access information is very seductive, especially for young folks as discussed in a recent Birmingham Science City survey about where kids go for answers, and it isn’t parents and teachers.

But we don’t require a study to know this.  Do we?

The bigger question is: …

Making your home a sanctuary is a matter of what you believe about personal security. Our faith tells us that security starts from within every heart and mind. It is the thoughts we choose. (Philippians 4:8). Fear-based thinking disturbs the peace and keeps us separated from God’s love. It is a hopeless and powerless state of heart and mind. And fear-based thinking is the consequence of evil deeds if we allow it. Romans 12:21 “ Do not be overcome with evil, rather overcome evil with good.” So how do we translate this truth with our children so that they can find the peace of Jesus in their hearts and minds?

Indeed the cyber technology powering individuals, homes, campuses and offices has raised the bar for the standard for parenting. Distracted on so many levels away from what really matters, the parent-child relationship is strained.

One of the most important things we can do as parents is not be fearful when dealing with our children’s circumstances. If your child gets into trouble, the most important thing to do is not freak out, so they can have an opportunity to relate to you about it and seek your wise counsel. We first must be able to help our children know they are forgiven, and their poor or risky choices will have consequences which they can endure, and they can stand corrected.

So in order to be secure, our children must first be resilient. Resiliency involves accepting the things they cannot change about themselves and circumstances, and then having the confidence, courage and the wisdom to change the things they can. In this regard, parents who love children who are different demonstrate how to build resiliency in our children.

Our children are raised in a network culture that rejects boundaries and limits. What I love about Peggy’s book is it illustrates how allowing children to be entitled is actually disabling them. In today's consumer culture where parents have become first and foremost consumers, and then "friends," it is so important that as we provide for a modern lifestyle that also includes the blessings of discipline and character.

The first habit is Be Proactive. I use this at school whenever I get frustrated and mad. I think of calming down. I stop and think, "Am I wasting precious time?"- David Pascalau, 4th Grade, North Country Elementary

For me the most disturbing part of this topic, and what was revealed on STFU Parents, is how this brand of over sharing by parents demonstrates a lack of respect for children as individuals.

What parent hasn’t experienced outrage when an adult who is trusted to care for their child, abuses their power? Coaches, parents of other peers, teachers, principals, or our own spouses or ex-spouses -- at one time or another, children will have to contend with adult bullies.